nut hugger
They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
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