with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Randomize
