I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
