She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
