I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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