yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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