So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Randomize
