Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
