i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize