oh god the rape fog is back!
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
