There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
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