Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Randomize
