..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
i think my mom watched the whole time
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
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