u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
You know, be my cock's hype man.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
