Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
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