i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Randomize
