I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
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last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
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I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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