apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize