Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(812): View more from Indiana

obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date

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(309): View more from Illinois

I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.

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(787): View more from Puerto Rico

He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men

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(214): View more from Texas

You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp

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21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Read it at the TFLN blog
(678): View more from Georgia

I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope

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(225): View more from Louisiana

I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.

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(647): View more from Ontario

Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.

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(212): View more from New York

Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?

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(216): View more from Ohio

So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?

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