Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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