Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
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