At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
