I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
