I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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