In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Randomize