She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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