She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters