sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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