She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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