I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
my poor anus
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
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