shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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