I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Randomize
