farters have to be the big spoon...
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
