he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
