omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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