i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
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