You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
