Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
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