But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
