so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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