Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
high people should be assigned attendants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
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