i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
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He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
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