Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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