Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
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