what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
we're making bets on your personal life
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
