a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
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