I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
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