I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
