Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
