We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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